So I’m trying to not be worried. I have this feeling of impending failure. It’s as if I know that this show is going to be disastrous. Like calamity is right around the corner. My dreams are being haunted by the horse that won’t go past X. Followed by a horse that stops at C, does a 180 and gallops right out of the arena. Again followed by the horse that gets to X, freaks out, actually says “What are you THINKING?” and proceeds to gallop/jump out of the arena.
So, I began to really contemplate - What is it that I fear failing? The competitor in me fears coming in DEAD last (but believe me, I’ve done that plenty of times), or being eliminated because my horse decided that we should be doing canter pirouettes and then leaping out of the arena instead of a calmly trotted twenty meter circle. Somehow, under my delusions of grandeur, I came up with the weird contortion of a thought that we might actually do well and perhaps ribbon. *cough cough – trying not to blush from embarrassment*
In light of this rather deluded epiphany, I decided I needed a realistic goal. After all – I’m taking two THREE year olds in a dressage class. Yes, that’s right. THREE year olds. And they’re ARAB’S – of all breeds! Not only Arabs, but EGYPTIAN Arabs. Basically they’re the flakiest of the flakes. Maybe I should be calling the show managers and begging for my money and registration back!
So realistically, what did I at least hope to achieve by this show? What attainable goals could I set?
Well, my greatest hope is that my boys have a POSITIVE experience. Yes, they may freak out. Yes, they make shoot out the arena and eliminate us. But, I think that, no matter what, we can at least walk away from this show having learned something, and doing our best to handle our mistakes/disapointments well. And most importantly, if something does go horribly wrong, we are not going to be guaranteed failure at every future turn. Gaining confidence and positive experience can only propel us forward.
I think this can work. I will do my best (which includes, staying a calming and positive influence on the boys), and lovingly accept their best or worst. My walls might not yet be pinned with ribbons, but we have to start somewhere. And that somewhere is this show.
So, I began to really contemplate - What is it that I fear failing? The competitor in me fears coming in DEAD last (but believe me, I’ve done that plenty of times), or being eliminated because my horse decided that we should be doing canter pirouettes and then leaping out of the arena instead of a calmly trotted twenty meter circle. Somehow, under my delusions of grandeur, I came up with the weird contortion of a thought that we might actually do well and perhaps ribbon. *cough cough – trying not to blush from embarrassment*
In light of this rather deluded epiphany, I decided I needed a realistic goal. After all – I’m taking two THREE year olds in a dressage class. Yes, that’s right. THREE year olds. And they’re ARAB’S – of all breeds! Not only Arabs, but EGYPTIAN Arabs. Basically they’re the flakiest of the flakes. Maybe I should be calling the show managers and begging for my money and registration back!
So realistically, what did I at least hope to achieve by this show? What attainable goals could I set?
Well, my greatest hope is that my boys have a POSITIVE experience. Yes, they may freak out. Yes, they make shoot out the arena and eliminate us. But, I think that, no matter what, we can at least walk away from this show having learned something, and doing our best to handle our mistakes/disapointments well. And most importantly, if something does go horribly wrong, we are not going to be guaranteed failure at every future turn. Gaining confidence and positive experience can only propel us forward.
I think this can work. I will do my best (which includes, staying a calming and positive influence on the boys), and lovingly accept their best or worst. My walls might not yet be pinned with ribbons, but we have to start somewhere. And that somewhere is this show.
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